I feel like I need a drum roll... this has been building up to more than it had to. The funny thing is that when I was prepared to write this the date was APRIL 1, 2010 and so I waited another day so nobody would think it was an APRIL FOOLS joke. That one day wait ended up being much longer and probably for the better because when I woke up the next morning I imagined having told you all the news the night before and I didn't like the way I was feeling. Am I feeling any better about my decisions today... no, but these past few weeks allowed me to look at everything more objectively and not emotionally. You wouldn't believe me if I even told you how many times I fired up a new blog post and deleted everything but today is for real. I have probably over thought it all but it was worth it because what I was going to write originally is not what I am writing today. How ever you may feel I can tell you that my original post would have been worse.

MY WEBSITE... as much as I could sit here for 24 hours straight and write about it I won't. What I will say is that running my site while working a full time job was a perfect formula for insanity! Not to mention the emails and all that other stuff online. Poor me right?! Look, this was my first time ever operating a website and yes of course I knew that it was going to be a lot of work but that is not what I was afraid of or couldn't handle... it was the time. The time it took to edit, upload, webcam, the ask sofia etc. was ridiculous. So I cut my youtube out, myspace, don't reply to emails... next thing I know I still don't get everything done. STRESS kicks in and it affects me like never before, I lost too much weight and other stuff I just won't get into... the point is that as much as I wanted to perform 100% at my full time job, 100% in my personal life, 100% in my family life and 100% to my website I just couldn't. I gave up my personal life, limited my family life to 1 day a week or every other week, called in sick just to ensure I can give 100% to the site. I saw and felt myself turning into another person and it was definitely not for the better. My body was shutting down. Poor me right?! I ran to my twitter as an escape but that obviously just took more of my valuable time. Something had to give and it did.

I've been told many times why am I still working if I have a site and the simple answer is that it allows me to be me and not Sofia Legend. For 40 hours a week I get to be normal, my job is fun and I love the people working with me but then when one finds out that I am Sofia Legend everyone knows and it doesn't become fun anymore and I lose my normal life. I understand that I'm not a Hollywood celebrity! Of course I can go here and there and have a normal life but it's obviously not the same and plus I do get noticed once in a while and that always plays in the back of my head when I go out.

Yes, once in a while I do miss my normal life before Sofia Legend and as much as I tried to get it back with my job it really was not the same. I tried to have the best of both worlds but at one point or another they will cross paths and one needs to make a decision... and I did. Last month I gave my company my resignation letter. As of today I do not have a job.

The more thought I put into everything I came to an interesting conclusion... as much as I thought my job was giving me my happy balance in life it was actually doing the opposite. My job was a comfort zone, it basically became an excuse for all my problems. I looked as my job as an escape but in reality it was taking me away from Sofia Legend. As much as I miss my life before Sofia Legend I also miss YOU more! What I'm trying to say is that I miss just waking up in the morning knowing that I will be spending the day with you. Stressing every morning on how I will fit you guys in my day was killing me. It basically all came to a point where I was just doing the absolute minimum to keep you guys from bitching 24/7. The minimum was the only solution I had left or else I was going to throw in the white towel... that minimum also gave me a little free time to really think about what I was doing.

The money from the site should have been a no-brainer to quit my job earlier but I thought my work was making me happy when in reality it was taking me away from what was making me happier. Quitting my job is only one of the few changes that I will be making to ensure that when I am ready to reboot it will not only be what I expect but what you will expect. As much as some of you may be disappointed in my progression... I am disappointed more.

In the meantime I have decided to be inactive online for the next 3 months and that includes no updates on the site. I may pop in here and there if I get a fair chance but please don't expect it. For ALL the current members freaking out right about now or yelling "THIS IS BS" I am offering you all refunds prorated. Simply send me an email at sofia@sofialegend.com and I will refund what ever is left on your membership.

The annual sign ups on my site has been taken off. I will continue to only allow monthly memberships... first month at $9.95 USD.

For the next 3 months I will be focusing on the World Cup Soccer coming up and I will be back mid July with no 40 hour a week job to hold me back.

I am terribly sorry for this extremely slow pace in getting my site content up to date but I won't apologize for the actual content for the obvious reason that the photos were never taken to be posted on my personal website. I never ever imagined that I would even have one. The photos were intended for facebook and stuff like that. Though there are almost 100 galleries and over 2000 photos on my site they are to show the progression of Sofia Legend in photos from the beginning. It is important to me to have the true story in photos on my site. If you simply want that typical stuff then you are in the wrong place and I suggest you send me an email so I can refund your remaining membership. Please understand that I have not yet taken 1 single photo shoot for my site, yes it's still older content but that will be done soon and then what? Give your two cents then, now it's simply no use complaining because the next 5 photo sets could be me in turtle necks and jeans watching birds in a sky... what is next is next by date, that is the integrity I want on my site. You have to be joking if you believe that I don't want to post newer photo sets asap... we are almost half way through 2010 and you actually think I am proud that I have 2008 photos up on my site as the latest gallery? It is what it is right now, I tried to get it all done faster but I couldn't. I quit my job to make sure that when I return to reboot in mid July that I will also have my surprise ready and that every single penny you ever invested in me will be worth it!

I can't believe it's 5:30AM :(( This took my over 5 hours to write and I said I was going to get to the points I had to say, sorry I guess I just wanted to get a few things off my chest and so when I return I can start fresh. I won't completely vanish but I'll be away for 99% of the time. I'll mostly tweet here and there so please make sure to follow me if you aren't already...

http://twitter.com/sofialegend

I'll miss you...